Am I a grumpy old man or a superhero?

Lately I have been thinking about what my kids think of me? What kind of dad am I in their eyes? Am I a cool dad? I think I am cool. A superhero? I don't have a cape or powers. A smarty pants? I didn't finish college so I'm not very smart. A dad That expects too much of them? I believe that they are smart, strong and beautiful girls that will do whatever they set their minds to. A loving dad? I love them more than anything and make sure they know that by say it too them all the time. A bossy dad? Maybe sometimes, but nothing wrong with that. Grumpy old man dad? I feel like it sometimes. A hilarious dad? I am hilarious. A dad like bluey's dad, bandit? No one can live up to the standards of that dog. A dad that is alway correcting them? Well when they behave I don't have too.

First some base information for the topic on hand. let's talk about the amount of time I have with the girls at home on average. I work four days a week. The days can be anywhere from 10 to 13 hours long depending on the delivery routes they give me. I also have 30 minutes to work and with traffic 45ish minutes home. So that gives me on average 2ish hours that i am home with the family on the days that i work. Thank God for my 3 day weekends!

I tried to break it down mathematically. The fact is that the 2 hours I get with my family is around 12.5% of the time that I am awake on any given workday. Not a lot of time. So with that being said I was thinking about what to do with that information. My kids don't get to see me the other 87.5% of my day to get a sense of the person I am. They don't see me when I am sitting in traffic calmly and not yelling at the other drivers. They don't see how I interact with my customers. They don't see how hard I work. They don't see how I handle the hard, stressful or challenging problems on my job. They see me at home on the 2 hours or on the weekends. So I need to make that time count.

When I was thinking of how I was going to write about this. I couldn't decide on the way I was going to go about It. So I thought about breaking it down into how am I filling that 12.5% of time to be the most effective. But I didn't think that was a good way to write about it. So I thought about breaking down how I act in the 2 hours and make it into a pie chart of some sort. Maybe that would show me how I can act better to help my kids see a better me. But I don't think that was what I wanted to write either. So I thought about how I looked at my own dad throughout my childhood to see what I could learn from him.

When I was young I remember my mom saying that dad was “her superman.” I was confused so I asked her what she meant and she told me to look at him. So I looked at him and he did the superman pose. You know the one. Hands on the hips, chest pushed out, head to the side. The only thing missing was a cape and a breeze. Growing up I thought my dad was the coolest. Practically A superhero. He worked harder than anyone I knew. Could build anything you could think of. Was super strong and taught me weightlifting through books with Arnold schwarzenegger and lou ferrigno. Showing me the proper techniques and then spotting me so I didn't hurt myself. He played guitar and lead worship teams at church. We spent a lot of time playing music together. We shared a passion for fishing. We spend many days and nights on the river banks pulling in anything that would bite. He took me to work with him and let me use power tools. He was the best.

Thinking back at my childhood as an adult I can see things from the adult perspective. I remember my dad being tired when he came home. Obviously worn out from a hard day's labor. But what I remember more is he still took the time and energy to play with us. From pillow fights, to going outside in the yard, to rough housing or playing catch. It would have been completely understandable to want to sit on the couch and relax. Sometimes he did and he shared with us all the classic movies.

I remember my dad losing his temper sometimes, as all parents do. But what I remember more is my dad coming back to us later and apologizing for his outburst. Sitting us down and explaining that it is ok to be upset sometimes, but you can't take it out on others so you need to apologize for outbursts. I remember all the punishments my parents gave me when I pushed them too far. But what I remember more is my dad sending me to my room, giving himself time to calm down. Then sitting with me and talking to me about exactly what I was getting punished for. Explaining how the punishment was coming out of love because my parent's job was to teach me right and wrong, so I could become a better adult. I remember dad having me come to work with him and how hard it was to wake up and go to work like an adult. But what I remember more is all the memories and time spent with my dad. None of my friends got to spend every day with their dads. working side by side, being respected, building things to be proud of. I wouldn't trade those times for anything. I remember going through my rebellious teenage years. All the fights we had. How he told me he was disappointed in my behavior. But what I remember more is him telling me that his disappointment came from him knowing and seeing who I was as a person and what I was capable of. And Challenging me to be the person he and God saw me as. Challenge me to step up and be a Man. I remember my dad always telling me how proud he was of me and to never forget how much he loved me no matter what.

The lessons I learned from my dad was to be the rock in your family. We all have flaws. Learn from the mistakes and always try to be better than the day before. Don't be afraid to own up to your short fallings in front of your kids. You don't have to be perfect. Your kids already think of you as a superhero. Just act like one. If you do that, the good memories will shine through. My dad was and will always be my superhero. Now I need to go buy a cape because my girls deserve the very best superhero….